Dr Troy Alexander will be forced to face Lucas Daniels in a wrestling match this Saturday night. Here are five ways Dr Troy can defy the odds and beat the longest-reigning PCW National Champion.

1. Mix poison into the fog fluid used in the stage smoke cannon

We all know Lucas Daniels loves to inhale the burst of smoke that shoots up from the stage in his entrance. Dr Troy, perhaps it’s time to take a page from Walter White’s book and get yourself some ricin asap!


2. Replace the ramp with stairs

It’s no secret that Lucas Daniels has a severe reoccurring quad injury, that is so bad, it makes referee Micks’ go-karting injury seem insignificant. And what do people with quad injuries hate more than Mountain Biking off the side of a cliff? Stairs! Dr Troy, here is another tip, try and have Lucas Daniels carry a tray of coffees when climbing the stairs.


3. Convince Nate Cross to help

Nate Cross is in a vulnerable state after tag-partner and close confidant Charlie Matthews left him for another¬†partner on Love Island Australia. Dr Troy, it’s time to slide into those DM’s and manipulate your way into Nate’s heart. We’re totally vibing it.


4. Pray for a seismic event

In June 2012, Melbourne was rocked by an earthquake so severe, it knocked over deck chairs across the state. Resilient Melbournians vowed to rebuild; and that we did! It’s been over 7 years since that fateful evening, so surely it’s only a matter of time before we’re rocked with an earthquake so large that Ken calls an audible and cancels the show. Pray Dr Troy, pray!


5. Did you know that this list initial started with “10 ways Dr Troy can beat Lucas Daniels”

Put simply, we can’t find a fifth reason, let alone a 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th and 10th. Sorry Dr Troy, but you’re rooted.